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PARADISE TOWERS

PART TWO

Written by
STEPHEN WYATT


1. EXT. PARADISE TOWERS

(An exterior view of the Towers, high up in the sky. The glass walls and windows of the Towers reflect the fluffy white clouds hanging in the sky.)


2. INT. THE CARETAKER HEADQUARTERS

(The caretakers enter pulling the Doctor along with them. The Chief is at his desk and rises to meet them.)

DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Chief!
CHIEF CARETAKER: Later, Deputy. Release him. Greetings. I am the Chief Caretaker.
DOCTOR: How d'you do. I am...
CHIEF CARETAKER: No need to tell me. I know who you are. We have been waiting for this momentous visit for so many years. You are the man who brought Paradise Towers to life. The visionary who dreamed up its pools and lift and squares. And now you have returned to your creation. You will make all those dilapidated lifts rise and fall as they've never done before. All signs of wallscrawl will disappear from the corridors of Paradise Towers. The floor will gleam, the windows will shine and all will be made as new. Fellow Caretakers, d'you know who this is. This is the Great Architect returned to Paradise Towers. Bid him welcome. All Hail the Great Architect, all hail.
CARETAKERS: All hail the great architect.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: What shall we do with him now then, Chief?
CHIEF CARETAKER: Kill him.

(The Chief moves away from the Doctor.)

DOCTOR: Wait a minute! Listen.
CHIEF CARETAKER: Why?
DOCTOR: Well I'm not the great architect. I'm the Doctor.
CHIEF CARETAKER: Oh the Doctor now is it? He always was an artful one the Great Architect. Make the preparations will you, Deputy.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER:
Very good, Chief.

(The Chief sits at the control desk as the Deputy leans over his shoulder.)

DOCTOR: Well you can't condemn me without trial, without evidence, without proof. I mean, I don't even know who this Great Architect is.
CHIEF CARETAKER: The 327 appendix 3 Subsection 9 Death I think.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: 32...Very good, Chief.

(There is a bleep from the control console.)

CHIEF CARETAKER: Oh that would happen just now. (He picks up the communicator and speaks into it) Yes? (He pauses to listen) Oh dear, oh dear. Poor Caretaker Number 345 stroke 12 Subsection 3. (He listens to the voice on the other end.) What, now? (He pauses again to listen) Yes, alright, alright. There's no need to quote the rule book at me, Caretaker Number 579 Stroke 14 Subsection 8. I'll come. (He replaces the communicator and stands)
DOCTOR: Anything the matter?
CHIEF CARETAKER: Nothing that isn't under control. Thank you, Great Architect. An unfortunate accident has happened to Caretaker Number 345. I am required by the rulebook to go and investigate it. The 327 appendix 3 Subsection 9 Death will be postponed until I return. In the meantime you will guard the Great Architect here with your lives. D'you understand?
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Yes, Chief, no problem.


3. INT. STREET

(Mel and Pex emerge onto yet another of the dirty streets of Paradise Towers. This street has large globe-like lights protruding from the walls.)

PEX: Mel?
MEL: What is it now?
PEX: Mel. Watch this. Oh go on. Please?
MEL: I'm in a hurry you know that. And that ceremony in the square gave me the creeps.
PEX: It won't take a moment.

(He makes breathing noises and, reaching up, removes a light from its fitting on the wall. With a few more puffs, he takes hold of both ends of the light's arm attachment and bends it. Looking pleased with himself he drops it to the floor followed by a breaking sound.)

MEL: (Unimpressed) ...Well?
PEX: I'm a finely tuned fighting machine. I work out everyday...
MEL: Pex!
PEX: Practice martial arts...
MEL: Pex!
PEX: Run the length of 70...
MEL: Pex. If you could bend that back into shape and put it where it came from, it might be more use but you can't can you.
PEX: Well, that's not my job. I'm Pex.
MEL: I know and you're here to put the world of Paradise Towers to rights. Well go on. I've got to find my friend and I can't waste anymore time.
PEX: Mel?


4. INT. SQUARE

(Fire Escape runs down the stairs and joins the rest of the Red Kangs gathered in the square for a meeting.)

FIRE ESCAPE: Build High for Happiness.
RED KANGS: (Chorus) Build High for Happiness.
FIRE ESCAPE: All sound and safe?
BIN LINER: The un-young Doctor and the girl who isn't a Kang are lost for now.
FIRE ESCAPE: And No Exit?
BIN LINER: No Exit's not here.
FIRE ESCAPE: Where is she?
BIN LINER: Was on Talky-Phone 3 before Caretakers attacked.

(Fire Escape runs over to the Talky-Phone in the corner followed by Bin Liner.)

FIRE ESCAPE: Not now? (Bin Liner shakes her head) Mayhaps No Exit's returned to Red Kang Brain-quarters.
BIN LINER: Mayhaps or...?
FIRE ESCAPE: Or..?
BIN LINER: No Exit's unalive.
BIN LINER: Taken to the cleaners?
BIN LINER: Yes, taken to the cleaners.


5. INT. BASEMENT

(The Basement features a assortment of pipes and the sound of rumbling can be heard. On the floor are the discarded remains of a Yellow Kang garment. A large door open at one end of the chamber, through it enters a large white cleaner. At the rear of the robotic Cleaner is a large bin from which protrudes the leg of the deceased Young Caretaker. The Cleaner glides towards another large doorway which opens as it approaches. Two lights can be seen through the doorway and lots of smoke obscures a clear view inside.)


6. INT. CARETAKER HEADQUARTERS

(The Doctor sits on a bench against the wall between two silent Caretakers. One of whom is the deputy. The other holds the Doctor's umbrella.)

DOCTOR: Shall I tell you what puzzles me most. Those cleaners that we had so much trouble with. Well presumably they're part of the organisation of Paradise Towers like your Caretakers. So why should they attack you.

(No response from either side.)

DOCTOR: And another thing. I don't know why you're so keen to kill off the Great Architect. I thought you'd be delighted to have him here to put things to right. It doesn't make sense. Well does it?

(Again, no response from his fellows.)

DOCTOR: I'd hate to have to live my life by some boring old rulebook like you do. You must get fed up? Well do you?
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: No.
DOCTOR: Never?
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Never.
DOCTOR: I suppose how you guard me is in that rulebook.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Yes! Rule 45B Stroke 2 Subsection 5.
DOCTOR: I wouldn't mind having a look at that rulebook if that's not against the rules. I mean after all, I am a condemned man.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Erm... (He flicks through the pages of the rulebook.) Yes, we can count that as your last request. You're entitled to one if you're to undergo a 327 Appendix 3 Subsection 9 Death. Not a pretty way to go.

(He passes the rulebook over to the Doctor whilst laughing to himself. The Doctor starts to leaf through its pages.)

DOCTOR: (Laughs to himself) How extraordinary. No, no. It can't be true.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: What's that?
DOCTOR: Oh no, no. It's... You couldn't possibly.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: If it's there, it's true. Rules are rules. Orders are orders.
DOCTOR: If you say so. I don't want to make a fool of you.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Read out what it says!
DOCTOR: Oh very well but I find it hard to credit...
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Read it!
DOCTOR: It says here about a 327 Appendix 3 Subsection 9 Death, that after you've been guarding the condemned prisoner for 35 minutes, you must all stand up.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: But if we...
DOCTOR: Yes, yes, I find it extraordinary. I don't really expect you to do it. But it is in there.
(The Deputy and his Subordinate both stand up looking a little uncertain of events.)
DOCTOR: The Caretakers present must then move 5 paces away from the prisoner.
(The Deputy and his Subordinate walk 5 paces forward away from the Doctor.)
DOCTOR: Five. Close their eyes and put their hands above their head.
(The Doctor stands up and makes his way gingerly towards them. He opens the Deputy's back pocket and takes out the Caretaker Headquarters' Door Security cards. He turns and walks slowly away to the door.)
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: How long do we do this for?
DOCTOR: For about a minute and a half. You see that's how long the prisoner needs.

(The Doctor turns to see his umbrella which he retrieves from the subordinate. He then makes his way to the door.)

DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: To do what?
DOCTOR: Find the key card to the door and escape.
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Sorry?

(The Doctor makes his way to the door and tries out several of the key cards.)

DOCTOR: Find the key card to the door and escape.

(The door opens and the Doctor exits giving a courteous, goodbye doff of his hat. Meanwhile, over the other side of the room, the Deputy turns to his subordinate.

DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Rules should always make sense. Why should we allow a prisoner...?

(He turns quickly to catch the sight of the Doctor's umbrella poking through the closing door. The umbrella then finally disappears and with it, the Doctor from their captive.)


7. INT. STREET

(Mel and Pex appear from the stairwell and venture searchingly into the dark corridor.)

MEL: Doctor? DOCTOR??

(Mel and Pex then disappear out of sight down another street only to miss the Doctor as he appears silhouetted at the other end.)

DOCTOR: Mel? Mel?

(The Doctor runs from one end of the corridor to the other only to disappear up the stairway which Pex and Mel had moments before descended from.)

DOCTOR: Mel?


8. INT. SQUARE

(Mel and Pex appear on the walkway over looking the square where the TARDIS landed.)

MEL: Oh no. We're back at the square again.
PEX: I've been trying to confuse anyone who might be following us. It's part of the training.
MEL: Does your training include confusing yourself at the same time.
PEX: I'm not confused.
MEL: So you know where to go next to get up to the pool then.

(Pex remains on the walkway whilst Mel jogs down to the ground.)

PEX: Of course.
MEL: Well then.
PEX: We go that way.
MEL: You sure.
PEX: Of course I'm sure.

(Pex runs down the stairs to join Mel.)

MEL: Pex, can I ask you something why are here?
PEX: What?
MEL: Why are here?
PEX: What d'you mean?
MEL: Well there's nothing else like you here, is there.
PEX: You can say that again. Shall I show you how...?

(He strikes a pose a goes to break some other part of the crumbling fountain area.)

MEL: Ah! No! I think you've wrecked quite enough for one day. Tabby and Tilda talked about a war.

(In the street behind them leading off from the Square, four Blue Kangs venture forward and hide in the shadows. Pex senses that something is there and moves in that direction.)

MEL: They said that only the Oldsters and the Youngster were brought to the Paradise Towers and the rest, well the In-betweens, were sent off to fight and never came back. So how does it happen that you're here?
PEX: Isn't it obvious?
MEL: No, it isn't obvious at all. Pex. You say you want to help me get up to the pool and find my friend the Doctor, so I have to know.
PEX: I was sent here. The power to protect has been invested in me.
MEL: Who by?
PEX: By those I am not allowed to name.
MEL: And that's the truth? Really, the truth? (Pex nods.) Then I have to believe you. It can't be safe hanging around in this square any longer.
PEX: You're in no danger with me around.
MEL: Are you sure?
PEX: Of course I'm sure. Come on. We go this way.

(Pex darts off across the square with Mel following reluctantly. From their hiding place in the shadows, the four Blue Kangs appear and secretly set off in pursuit of Pex and Mel.)


9. INT. STREET

(The Doctor steps out into yet another street which looks more or less like any other. He stands in the centre of the crossroads.)

DOCTOR: Mel? Mel?

(After calling out and receiving no response, the Doctor notices some graffiti on the wall down the street. It shows a cleaner carrying something towards a door with “No Entry” written on it that belches out smoke.)


10. INT. STREET

(The Chief Caretaker stand in a street clutching his clipboard in one hand and a communicator in the other. He is with two other silent and depressed Caretakers.

CHIEF CARETAKER: Now the main thing, fellow Caretakers, is not to panic. Just because it appears that something unfortunate may have happened to Caretaker Number 345 Stroke 12 Subsection 3, we must not go leaping to conclusions. Careless chat about the Robotic Self-activating Megapodic mark 7Z Cleaners having got out of control is not going to help anyone, and may needlessly upset other Caretakers. Many explanations are possible for this unlucky accident. In the mean time all Caretakers will continue to patrol their assigned streets as before. I'm sure you will be quite safe.

(There is a beep from his communicator.)

CHIEF CARETAKER: Who did that? Oh. Yes?
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: Chief?
CHIEF CARETAKER: Yes, Deputy?
DEPUTY CHIEF CARETAKER: The Great Architect has escaped.
CHIEF CARETAKER: He's what!?!


11. INT. TILDA AND TABBY'S APARTMENT

(Tilda and Tabby are seated at their kitchen table finishing the remains of their dinner. Tabby bites into a small bone, making sure she has removed every piece of meat from it.)

TABBY: Ooh that was delicious, dear.
TILDA: Thank you, dear.
TABBY: A little on the small side of course.
TILDA: Well, I'm sure we could both have done with a little more. Now days you have to take what you can find. Perhaps something better will turn up before too long.
TABBY: We can only hope so.

(They both pause as they hear a knock at the front door.)

TABBY: D'you suppose it's that delicious little Mel.
TILDA: She did say that she'd come back. Come in.

(The front door opens and an elderly woman dressed in a yellow cardigan and floral attire enters.)

MADDY: It's only me.
TILDA: Oh, Maddy, dear, how nice to see you.
MADDY: I'm not intruding.
TABBY: No, no. We're just finishing.
MADDY: You're sure.
TILDA: Yes, of course. Have some tea.
MADDY: Oh thank you very much.

(Maddy walks over to the table and sits herself down at the table with her fellow Rezzies.)

MADDY: I just had to come over and tell you.
TABBY: Tell us what, Maddy?
MADDY: Another Caretaker's disappeared.
TABBY: (a deep intake of air) was it the Kangs?
MADDY: Well, they're trying to make out that it might be but from what I've heard there's more to it than anyone's letting on. I mean people just don't vanish do they.
TABBY: No, no, of course not. There's always something left behind.

(Tabby covers the remains of her dinner with a napkin and Maddy watches rather uncomfortably.)


12. INT. STREET

(The Doctor appears running down the street, clearly out of breath. He stops by a phone terminal – located by what appears to be a servicing door. He picks up the phone to check for a tone but finds none.)

DOCTOR: Nothing ventured (hopeful). Nothing gained (disappointed).

(In frustration he hits the terminal with his hands. The result of this action is the release of dozens of coins falling out of the socket. He catches the majority of them in his hat. He picks up one coin and examines it.)

DOCTOR: Jackpot! Issued by the Great Architect, Kroagnon. Kroagnon?

(Down the street that he has just run appears a Cleaner belching smoke. He is at first unaware of it. It makes its way toward the Doctor, blocking his exit.)

DOCTOR: Oh no. Not you again. I've got too many things to work out, you really aren't helping. What d'you want anyway? Oh that is my death!

(He turns to run the other way but that is also blocked by yet another Cleaner.)

DOCTOR: Think calmly!

(He is surrounded by smoke from both of the Cleaners. He backs away and falls against the servicing door which promptly opens. Losing his balance he tumbles backwards through it and once inside, it closes behind him. The two Cleaners remain belching smoke.)


13. INT. STREET

(Mel and Pex descend the stairway and find that the lift has stopped on their floor.)

MEL: Oh.
PEX: Wait there. I'll check if it's safe.

(Pex gets his gun out and striking a pose, he enters the lift to investigate any dangers.)

MEL: Well?
PEX: It's safe.
Mel: Good.

(As Mel and Pex go to enter the lift, a gang of Blue Kangs run into the open and capture them.)


14. INT. RED KANG BRAINQUARTERS

(The Doctor is laying on the floor of the Brainquarters and is slowly regaining consciousness. Like the rest of the Towers the room is quite dirty. Against the walls are loads of shelves containing large tins of a variety of consumables.)

DOCTOR: What's happening... I really don't understand...(hazily sitting up.)
BIN LINER: Build high for happiness, Doctor.
DOCTOR: Oh! Build high for happiness. What happened?
FIRE ESCAPE: You dropped down, Doctor. Whoosh into our Brainquarters. Where is the girl who isn't a Kang?
DOCTOR: I only wish I knew. Fire Escape. Bin Liner. I never expected to see you again. I didn't expect to be glad to see you again. But I've got to go, there's much to be done.

(The Doctor moves to leave the hideout but his way is blocked by the surrounding Red Kangs.)

BIN LINER: No way!
FIRE ESCAPE: No ball games, no fly-posts. No out-going.
BIN LINER: Why you here, Doctor.
DOCTOR: It was an accident. I was being chased by two cleaners. And then suddenly...
FIRE ESCAPE: Cleaners!?!
DOCTOR: Yes. I expect they've gone by now.
FIRE ESCAPE: (To Bin Liner) Check for safe and sure on the Talky-Phone.
DOCTOR: Do I get the impression I'm not believed.
FIRE ESCAPE: Cleaners make Kangs unalive.
DOCTOR: Do they now. Why don't you tell me about it?

(Fire Escape makes it clear she doesn't want to talk by turning her back to the Doctor.)

DOCTOR: What is the matter with everyone in the Towers? I simply don't understand. I mean the Cleaners go round killing people and carting them off and no one does anything about them. And all you Kangs can do is draw wallcrawls on the subject all over the place.
FIRE ESCAPE:
But the Cleaners..!!!
DOCTOR: I know because I've seen them. And the Caretakers, they're no better. They allowed themselves to be killed off without saying anything either. Just because there's nothing about it in their precious rulebook.
FIRE ESCAPE: You mean to say...
DOCTOR: I know because I've read it.
FIRE ESCAPE: ...there's a wipe-out of Caretakers as well.
DOCTOR: Oh don't tell me you don't know. I mean what is going on? I mean what is behind that door belching out smoke that you Kangs are so keen on painting pictures of eh? Any ideas? Or that simply just another mystery?

(Fire Escape yet again turns away from the Doctor. Bin Liner goes up to Fire Escape to report.)

BIN LINER: Cleaners were in the carrydoor with sprinkle gas. There no more.
DOCTOR: Thank goodness for that. Can I have a look?

(The Doctor moves over to have a look at the large box on which the talky-phone is held. He lifts the phone from his housing.)

DOCTOR: You know you really are very stupid for such clever people. If I were you I'd find that door and discover what's behind it. Because until you do, we're all at risk, You, Me, Mel, Everybody. Are these antiques dotted around all over the building? It really is a splendid piece of Auditory Architect Matonical Metrasyncocity.
FIRE ESCAPE: It works!
DOCTOR: I'm sure.

(Bin Liner moves aggressively forward and grabs the phone from the Doctor. She taps in a sequence of numbers into the keypad and hands it back to the Doctor.)

DOCTOR: Hello? Sorry. Wrong number.

(He replaces the phone to its housing and starts to turn the large box housing it around. It reveals itself as a drinks machine.)

DOCTOR: Just one other thing. You probably haven't realised that this machine has another purpose.

(He removes his hat to produce a coin that he procured earlier when attacked by the two Cleaners in the Street. Before using it he stops to look at it.)

DOCTOR: Oh incidentally, yet another Paradise Towers mystery. Issued by the Great Architect, Kroagnon. Kroagnon? Oh I do wish I could place him. I mean what's happened to him since finishing this building. No one seems to know. Sorry.

(He goes to put the coin in a slot in the drinks machine. Bin Liner gets worried and raises her weapon. The Doctor promptly uses his umbrella to push it down again. He inserts the coin and then machine starts to hum into action. A Can of Drink falls into the dispenser pocket. The Doctor picks it up and removes the cap. The Kangs run off to take cover. Seeing him take a satisfying sip of the fizzy drink they relax and move forward towards him again.)

DOCTOR: Erm. Very refreshing.

(Bin Liner takes the can from the Doctor and takes a sip herself. Encouraged she passes it to Fire Escape who copies her.)

FIRE ESCAPE: Ice hot, Doctor.
FIRE ESCAPE & BIN LINER: Ice hot!

(Satisfied with himself, the Doctor smiles and wipes the drinks machine with his handkerchief.)


15. INT. THE BASEMENT

(The Chief Caretaker strides purposefully through the basement stopping briefly to pick up the remains of what appears to be Red Kang clothing. The Large door in front of him starts to open and smoke pours out of it. Ahead of him are two large neon lights that flash with the disembodied voice.)

CHIEF CARETAKER: Hello, my pet. How are you? Did you enjoy your nice Caretaker?
VOICE: Hungry!
CHIEF CARETAKER: Hungry? You can't be. Daddy's always made sure you get a good supply of what you need. Daddy's the Chief Caretaker, that's his main job.
VOICE: Hungry!
CHIEF CARETAKER: And why we're on the subject, Daddy's not too pleased with you. Now I didn't send you this little snack, did I? So how come it's got here? I mean the Cleaners wouldn't do things like that without orders from someone and it wasn't me so who was it? Now tell Daddy.

(No response.)

CHIEF CARETAKER: If you don't tell Daddy who's been feeding you behind his back, I won't give you the Great Architect to eat!
VOICE:
Hungry!
CHIEF CARETAKER: Alright. Alright. Alright. You'll get him just as soon as I can catch him again.
VOICE: Hungry!
CHIEF CARETAKER: But my pet, my darling. I don't understand, you're not usually like this. What's the matter? Tell Daddy.


16. INT. STREET

(The Blue Kangs have Mel and Pex trapped in a street corner outside a lift. The leader's name is Drinking Fountain.)

PEX: Fight.
DRINKING FOUNTAIN: Enough Muscle Brain. Get back.
MEL: Will you please tell us why you're holding us here.
DRINKING FOUNTAIN: We saw you with the Red Kangs.
MEL: Oh but they were holding me captive too. Look, my name's Mel. I'm a visitor here.
DRINKING FOUNTAIN: You know him.
PEX: I'm protecting her.

(The Blue Kangs all laugh derisively at Pex.)

MEL: Do you know anything about this person?
DRINKING FOUNTAIN: Oh the Kangs know the Muscle Brain. He's a scaredy-cat. When the In-Betweens sent us all here in the ship, us and the Oldsters, the Muscle Brain hid away and came with us because he didn't want to fight in the war with all the other In-Betweens.
PEX:
Who told you that?
DRINKING FOUNTAIN: Everyone knows that! The Oldsters call out after him in the Carrydoors, “The Muscle Brains a Scaredy-cat”.
BLUE KANGS – Scaredy-cat! Scaredy-cat! Scaredy-cat!
MEL: Pex?
PEX: What?
MEL: Is this true? IS THIS TRUE?
PEX: I've made up for it since I was here. Since I've been in Paradise Towers, I've been brave! A hero! A fighting...
MEL:
Sent by powers that you weren't allowed to name? I should have guessed. (To the Blue Kangs) Will you allow me to go if I go alone? I give you my word I mean you no harm. You can see I've got no weapons. Look! (They nod.) Thanks. Goodbye Pex.

(Mel turns to Pex and he looks sheepishly at her. Receiving his silent response she turns and walks off down the street alone, leaving the Blue Kangs to chant, “Scaredy-cat! Scaredy-cat! Scaredy-cat!”, at a demoralised Pex.)


17. INT. THE CARETAKER HEADQUARTERS

(The Chief and the Deputy are standing in the headquarters. The Chief is speaking over the Deputy's shoulder.)

CHIEF CARETAKER: So you still haven't discovered where the Great Architect has got to.
DEPUTY: No Chief.

(The Chief moves away from the Deputy to stand facing him.)

CHIEF CARETAKER: And you have no idea as to his whereabouts at all.
DEPUTY: No Chief. Unless?
CHIEF CARETAKER: Unless?
DEPUTY: Unless... He was taken by the cleaners?
CHIEF CARETAKER: Don't be absurd. Besides you are overlooking one very obvious possibility.
DEPUTY: What's that, Chief?
CHIEF CARETAKER: The Wallscrawlers! They've been getting very bold of late, making fun of authority. Summon all available Caretakers. We are going to start a 45D Section 3 Security Search.
DEPUTY: Yes, Chief.
CHIEF CARETAKER: The 327 Appendix 3 Subsection 9 Death of the Great Architect must take place. And besides even if the Wallscrawlers haven't got him... It's high time they were taught a severe lesson.


18. INT. STREET

(Mel is walking through the Rezzies part of Paradise Towers. She passes a few elderly women who look at her suspiciously even when she smiles at them. Walking around a corner, Mel finds herself outside Tilda and Tabby's Apartment, outside which stands Tilda.)

TILDA: Coo-ee? Care for a cup of tea? It's lovely to see you. We'd almost given up hope. How have you been getting on?
MEL: Oh not very well. I've been going round and round in circles.
TILDA: Oh what a shame. Come inside and rest your weary bones.
MEL: Oh I don't know, I... Yes. Yes, thank you. I will. I am very tired.

(Mel steps inside the apartment after Tilda who closes the door behind her. Tabby makes her way over to the entrance area to greet Mel.)

TILDA: Tabby, guess what. A real piece of good fortune. You'll never guess who's arrived for tea.
TILDA AND TABBY: Mel!


19. INT. STREET

(A patrol of Caretakers make there way down a street. One of them is carrying a scanning device which they are using to locate the Doctor. The machine emits a bleeping sound. They stop to check the street before continuing their search.)


20. INT. RED KANG BRAINQUARTERS

(The Red Kangs are busy handing out Fizzy Drinks from the drinks machine. Bin Liner hands a can to the Doctor.)

BIN LINER: Build high for happiness, Doctor.
DOCTOR: Build high for happiness. But let us not forget what we have to do. We must find Mel and discover the mystery of Paradise Towers because I've learned enough to realise that its very existence is at stake.
FIRE ESCAPE: Ice hot, Doctor. Ice hot.

(They are interrupted by the alarm sound. All the Kangs leap to attention and to their weapons in panic. Bin Liner goes to the spy hole.)

BIN LINER: Caretakers! I can see them through the Eye spy.
FIRE ESCAPE: Ware Doctor. He brings them here because like Caretakers he wants a Wallscrawlers unalive.
DOCTOR: Not at all. You don't understand. I mean, the last people I want to meet are the Caretakers; I'm in as much danger as you. More probably. You got to believe me. Listen we've got to work together. The Chief Caretaker's off his head. If we don't stop the wipe-outs, who will? Please?

(He looks around the room for reassurance from the Red Kangs.)


21. INT. STREET

(Outside the Red Kang Brainquarters, the Caretakers have an acetylene torch and are attempting to burn through the entrance door. The Deputy stands at the side watching.)


22. INT. TILDA AND TABBY'S FLAT

(Tilda, Mel and Tabby are sitting in the seating area. Tabby is toasting a crumpet on a long fork over a small fire.)

TABBY: You feeling better now, dear.
MEL: Erm. Yes, thank you. There's nothing like tea and crumpets is there? I feel so much more relaxed.
TABBY: Oh that's good to hear, isn't it Tilda.
TILDA: Yes, very good.
MEL: All the same, I really must be going now.
TILDA: Oh we couldn't possibly let you do that.
TABBY: Oh no, not this time.
TILDA: We can't possibly miss this opportunity, can we Tabby?
TABBY: No we can't Tabby, not since those horrid little Kangs got suspicious of our little ways.
TILDA: I am sorry, dear.
MEL: What d'you mean?
TILDA: Well you see, we would like you to stay for a very long time.
TABBY: In fact we don't imagine you ever leaving at all.
MEL: You are joking aren't you? Tilda? TABBY?
TABBY: We don't see this as a matter for humour, Mel dear. We mean every word.

(Tilda stands and advances on Mel. She throws her knitting over Mel's head and restrains her. Tabby threatens Mel with her long fork.)

TILDA: In our experience, Mel dear, it is much better not to struggle too much. It only causes needless distress!

(Mel lets out a piercing scream.)


CAST

The Doctor
SYLVESTER McCOY

Melanie
BONNIE LANGFORD

Chief Caretaker
RICHARD BRIERS

Deputy Chief
CLIVE MERRISON

Tilda
BRENDA BRUCE

Tabby
ELIZABETH SPRIGGS

Maddy
JUDY CORNWELL

Pex
HOWARD COOKE

Fire Escape
JULIE BRENNON

Bin Liner
ANNABEL YURESHA

Drinking Fountain (Blue Kang Leader)
CATHERINE CUSACK

PRODUCTION CREW

Theme Music Composed by
RON GRAINER

Theme Arrangement / Incidental Music
KEFF McCULLOCH

Sound
DICK MILLS

Production Manager
IAN FRASER

Production Associate
ANN FAGGETTER

Production Assistant
FRANCES GRAHAM

Assistant Floor Manager
VAL McCRIMMON

Visual Effects Designer
SIMON TAYLOR

Video Effects
DAVE CHAPMAN

Technical Co-ordinator
RICHARD WILSON

Camera Supervisor
ALEC WHEAL

Vision Mixer
SHIRLEY COWARD

Videotape Editor
HUGH PARSONS

Lighting Director
HENRY BARBER

Sound
BRIAN CLARK

Costume
JANET THARBY

Make-up Designer
SHAUNNA HARRISON

Script Editor
ANDREW CARTMEL

Graphic Designer
OLIVER ELMES

Designer
MARTIN COLLINS

Producer
JOHN NATHAN-TURNER

Directed by
NICHOLAS MALLETT

BBC MCMLXXXVII

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